I guess the closest thing we have to a wedding theme is to make it as environmentally-friendly as possible. Weddings are such big-business now, with the wedding industry pulling in a whopping $160-billion per year. The average American wedding costs nealry $30,000, and sadly, much of that money goes into buying things that are wasteful and pollutive — not to mention over-priced and unnecessary. I mean, just think of all the plastics, paper, and energy that is used to produce some of the decorations, favors, invitations, etc.ÂÂ
Of course we aren’t planning to spend anywhere near $30,000 on our wedding, but still, we won’t ever spend this much money on one single event again, so we want to make sure that we spend our money in an environmentally-conscious and ethical way.  I don’t want to get so caught up in all of the planning (and the countless “wedding” products that are being advertised to me that I don’t really want or need) that I forget what is important to us.
Two things that are very important to us are the environment and human rights (which so often intersect). I am, after all, studying to become an environmental journalist, and A. is an anthropologist with a long history of activism.  When A bought my engagement ring, he wanted to make sure that it was not a blood diamond, so he researched it thouroughly ended up buying an antique diamond and having the setting made separately for me. He could’ve bought an unethical diamond for the same price that was twice as big, but he stuck to his guns and didn’t allow the industry to play to his emotions and get him to go against what he believes in. In the end, the ring turned out to be so much more beautiful, and more meaningful because I knew he put so much thought and care into having it made - and no one had to suffer for it.
I guess I want to apply the same concept to our wedding. I think it will make it more intimate and special, and will reflect who we really are. Let’s face it - neither of us have ever been considered “normal” and we have both always danced to the beat of our own drummers. ÂÂ
Some choices we’ve made so far:
- We chose a reception venue that we knew could accommodate a vegetarian-friendly/organic menu, and they are a smaller, non-corporate establishment as well
- I chose a dress that is handmade in France (where they have very strict labor laws) in a small, ethically-run factory rather than in China, or some developing nation
- We printed our Save-the-Date cards on 100% post-consumer recycled card-stock
- We plan to use a mix of hand-made paper flowers (from recycled sources) and organic flowers instead of traditionally grown flowers that use tons of pesticides
- For our favors, we are going to give everyone tree seedlings wrapped in burlap; if people actually plant them they will help reduce global warming and improve air quality; and if people just toss them (like they do with most wedding favors) at least there will be no harm done
- We are staying in a cute little bed & breakfast for our wedding night, rather than some corporate hotel - it’s better to support the little guy!
So far, one obstacle that we’ve run into is with the food. A is vegan and I am vegetarian. We are vegetarian/vegan primarily for environmental and health reasons, but I think many people in our families feel that we are just being picky, weird, or flaky/hippies, or whatever. On occasion, I will eat a little bit of meat or fish, particularly if I am a guest at someone’s house who didn’t realize I was vegetarian (or when I’m at my parent’s house where there are never any vegetables to be found). But, when spending thousands of dollars on a meal, I don’t want that money to help support the factory-farming/meat/chemical fertilizer industry. It is just simply something that we are not comfortable with.
If it were entirley up to us, we wouldn’t serve any meat at all at the reception. BUT, I’m pretty sure we would have a mutiny on our hands, so we’ve decided that we will serve a limited amount of meat so that our families won’t have a freak out. However, it will have to be organic meat, which usually costs quite a bit more. The majority of the food will be vegan though and I think most people won’t even notice. We are going to do a buffet, rather than a sit-down meal, so that way we don’t have to send out the meal cards ahead of time. I can just see people getting the meal choice card in the mail and not seeing the standard beef, chicken or fish choices and being confused, so we will just skip that whole ordeal. This way, nobody will have time to dwell on it because they won’t realize there isn’t meat in most of the food until they are already there. Basically, we can almost “trick” people into eating vegetarian food by not mentioning that it’s vegetarian. I bet most people will be hungry enough not to care. And we are having open-bar, so that should help take their minds off the food for a bit, eh?
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